The great thing about writing a blog is that I can give all the unsolicited advice that I want, and if you don’t want it, you don’t have to read it. Today I want to talk about the pain that comes with personal growth. If you’re like more than half the people around, you already live with some kind of chronic physical pain. You’ve gotten used to it, you deal with it and hopefully, you’re doing some research on holistic prevention and methods to decrease the pain. There’s a difference between physical pain and pain that comes from a personal development journey. With physical pain, your body is trying to tell you that something is wrong that needs fixing. Emotional pain can be taken as a sign that things are actually on track.

The above only applies if you have already become aware that you are, indeed, on a personal journey. Many people are still in the dark, living their lives like there’s no purpose. Going to work, going home, feeling disappointed with life, but doing absolutely nothing to change things for the better. If you’re still reading, you probably already know that you want things to be different, and you might even know that it’s entirely possible for you to find the peace and happiness that already lives inside your soul. I’m going to share a little something about what kind of emotional pain you could face while you’re on the journey.

Not many people in the personal development industry talk about this. The emotional downs that come with growth are extraordinary. We all want you to believe that you can just snap your fingers and have everything you ever wanted. It DOES work like that, but evidence of all the changes don’t happen in that instant. Go ahead and snap your fingers now. Let’s get that part out of the way.

Now that you’ve snapped your fingers, asked for what you want and repeated all the positive affirmations you can think of, now the joyride begins. It’s up to you to pay attention to how the universe is moving in your favor. Things can begin to shift right away, and not all of those things will be wrapped in a bright, pretty little package. This is where the emotional pain comes in. You are stepping outside of your comfort zone. All the things that you’ve encountered up until now, those things that have created your personal history, you’ve gotten used to them. Just like any chronic pain you might experience, you know how to deal with your life as it is. Even if things are bad, you’ve created your coping mechanisms and you could really handle it for its duration. But you don’t want to… you know there’s something better out there for you.

But when you want change, you’ll have to work for it. I don’t mean work in the sense of physical labor. In fact, once you’ve snapped your fingers and put your wants out into the universe, you’ve pretty much marked it down in stone. The work I’m talking about is adjusting to all the lovely changes that need to take place in order for you to get from point A to freedom, love, happiness and peace; all those things that your soul is really craving.

Doors will begin to shut right behind you and others will magically appear. Keep your eyes open or you’ll miss those magical new doors. The part of this that seems unfortunate is that when you see an open door, it looks all scary and dark from where you’re standing. But remember, the door you came out of is closed now so the only option you really have is to walk through it. As long as you are paying attention, what’s going on will be crystal clear to you. You might lose your job. You might lose your home. Your best friend might decide to leave town. It will be up to you to deal with the grief and then figure out what this loss is making room for. You have lost something in order to gain something greater. I promise.

So, if you’ve asked for change and now your entire world seems to have turned upside down, this is such good news! I’ve experienced this first-hand myself. I can give you a personal guarantee that the growing pains you’ll feel while your life is in its transformation period will be greatly rewarded. If the universe hits you with a whammy, feel blessed that the cosmos recognizes that you are strong enough to handle it. Hang in there, pay attention, keep your thoughts positive and the other side of adventure will reveal the reasons that you might feel like you’re hitting brick walls.

Lately, I’ve been hearing a lot about telling the truth, being authentic and releasing resentments. There have been so many clues that I thought I might share this scenario, in case there are others who may benefit.

Resentments can get stored in your body and create many health problems. Resentments also are the result of not opening up and being truthful about your feelings, over which you have complete control.

This means, it’s up to you.

Please listen to my video and then leave a comment sharing your story or your secrets. I’d love to have your participation on this, and I encourage everyone to refrain from responding to others.

This is a sharing session, for our own personal development. If you want advice, please ask for it. Otherwise, we’ll all just try to listen and be supportive.

Peace and enjoy!

Well, it’s official! Through studying and learning how to make my own vision board, I’ve taken the option to become a certified vision board trainer. The last of 6 awesome classes was this afternoon, and as soon as I create my vision board video, of myself training the course, I’ll get my certification in the mail!

I’ve very excited about this. I’ve known about The Secret and vision boards for a few years now. When this opportunity popped up that allows me to share this information with others, and get paid for it, I couldn’t resist. I knew this was the perfect job for me.

Since I joined a couple months ago, they decided to hold their first certification class to teach us how to be official trainers. These vision board experiences are held in homes, schools and businesses that are interested in the law of attraction and want to know more about how vision boards can change the course of life! Not only do we as trainers teach you and your guests how to make your own vision board, but we also explain why there is so much power behind a vision board and how the neuroscience of the brain plays in.

This is an amazing concept, vision boards. And the company I’m working for is equally as amazing, offering so many opportunities to change a person’s life.  If you’d like to have a party in your home, please contact me. We would need to find out if there is a representative in your area, and if not, maybe that person could be you!! We are currently looking for just a couple more people to enroll in the next vision board certification, scheduled for December 6th, 2010. (If you’re reading this after that date, contact me and we’ll see if there’s another course coming up.)

I’ve got all the details of the classes, the parties, the opportunities and the training. We’ve also got some amazing products and a membership community that offers so much free training, it will make your head spin. And if you love John Assaraf, guess what?! Join the membership community and you’ll probably get to talk to him on the phone, as he’s the co-founder of this company!! I spoken to him personally and it was amazing and exciting and I can’t even explain to you how grateful I felt.

If this whole vision board business sounds like something you’d like to be involved in, please let me know. Don’t forget, there a free vision board training available for you to check out. You can learn to make your own vision board with a free video training. Once you’ve watched it, you may realize that you’ve been led to this and you could really begin generating some massive income into your life. And all by sharing something which you feel so passionate about.

I heart vision boards!! Sign up at the right of this page for your free vision board training, or visit How to Make Your Own Vision Boards to get access.

I can’t wait to hear from you!!

xo,

Jeannie

How To Create A Powerful Vision Board

This is a direct how to guide on creating a successful and powerful vision board that will help you to center yourself and channel your positive energy into the board, making the effect much stronger on your life involving you goal or dream for yourself in life. To find out what a vision board is and how to create one, click here.

You begin by being honest with yourself about what your ultimate goal or dream is. We all have dreams that may seem impossible, but they can actually be accomplished with some, determination, powerful positivity and a good solid vision board. After you have made your decision to create your own powerful vision board, start by keeping an eye out for pictures, colors and images that grab your eye. Some you will see and they will grab you with a definite “yes”, whereas others you may feel attracted to with a “buzzing” feeling in the pit of your stomach. Not every image that you collect will end up on your board, but until you get them all together to make the vision board you will not know for sure.

You can make your vision board from a piece of poster board, a small canvas or anything else of a similar fashion. Along the way you may have noticed that certain colors will have attracted your eye, so include them on the board. You may want to paint your board first in a color that has affected you, or you may want to keep it plain. If you have chosen to paint, wait until the paint dries, and then start placing the images onto the board. Move them around into different areas until you are happy with the final overall image. You may want to add inspirational words or “power words”, as they are also known, which reflect your ultimate goal or dream and have meaning to you. These words can further be used in a “mantra” which you say to yourself as you meditate or visualize your goal.

When everything is exactly how you want it, glue it all down to keep it in place. You may want to put a clear coat of glue over the whole board, to prevent any of the images from becoming loose. The choice is up to you, depending on where you intend to place it.

Your vision board is now complete. Making a vision board is only a key part in the whole process of using the law of attraction to fulfill your dreams and desires. Having determination, belief and patience are also exceptionally important key parts, as without them, the vision board would just be a collage. Regular visualization, meditation, affirmations and positive thinking are also very important. Each of these needs to be used every day, in conjunction with the actual vision board, to enable your success.

Vision boards of late can also be created using software programs which help you to create the right vision board for you, as well as make copies of the finished product so that you can carry it with you wherever you go.  Download it to small electronic gadgets or keep a copy on your laptop to use when you’re away from home.

For free vision board training, visit Vision Board How To

How To Close The Gap From Where You Are Right Now To Where You Want To Be Using The Vision Board

If you think about your current situation, then you may realize that there are some things in your life that you would like to improve.

Some people would like a better career, some would like financial security, and others would like children. You may want a whole range of different things. Everyone is individual and unique. Hopes and dreams may be similar to another person’s, but the details differ dramatically. Finding a way that allows you to close the gap from where you are right now to where you want to be, using the vision board, is a simple thing that anyone can achieve.

Vision boards are fantastic tools that can help change your life for the better. They allow you to keep your dreams and goals in mind so that you can move forward to bigger and better things. We can make a difference using this board, and making one is simple. There are two types of vision boards. The one you decide to choose and work with is entirely up to you.

A traditional vision board is constructed from clippings of pictures you may have found in magazines or printed from the internet. These pictures represent your dreams and goals. These pictures are then placed in a collage fashioned to a board. You can also add certain colors that take your eye, spray it with scents that invigorate you and include phrases that inspire you. Power words that you associate with your ultimate goal can also be used to empower you in your quest. When your vision board is finished and you are happy with what you have produced, it’s recommended to hang it in a place that you often look, whether that place is at home, at work or somewhere else. Wherever you spend the most time is the best place to hang your vision board. Constant visualization of the dreams and goals placed on this board will ensure you get what you want.

The other type of vision board is made by using a software program on your computer. There are many different types you can choose from, but each of them will help you to close the gap from where you are right now to where you want to be. The concept is the same as the traditional board, but it is all done electronically. With this method you can also add music or sounds that you find will help you to better visualize your goals. You can make copies to carry with you on your cell, PDA, IPOD and all of your computers, so that you are able to utilize any free time. Increasing the amount of time that you see your board and allow it to  empower you is of great benefit.

Now that you know about the different types of vision board you can choose which one you would like to make. You can, of course, choose both and use them at home and on your portable electronic devices to truly optimize your visualization time.

For free vision board training, visit Vision Board How To

You can find a Vision Board Kit and other tools and resources for getting from where you are to where you want to be by visiting V.I.S.S.

10 Tips to Make Sure The Items on Your Vision Board Come True

Vision boards are a fantastic way of using your inner power so that you can attract all of the things in your life that you have always wanted for yourself and for your family. Everyone, no matter at what stage in life they are, wants to change something about his or her life. A vision board is the perfect way of making it happen! There are some definitive ways of making sure that the items you have placed on your vision board come true. After sifting through hundreds of different ideas with this in mind, a rock solid and powerful top ten has been created. So if you want to make sure that what you want does come true then follow these tips.

1. Just for you – This is one of the most important things that people do not realize when they are making their own vision boards. Many people often use images that they think others would approve of or of things that society tells us are the right goals that we should be striving for. Make sure that you choose wisely what you want and that each picture, sound or word comes from within.

2. Listen to Music – Before and during the creation of your vision board it is a good idea to play a piece of music that makes your heart feel warm, it will allow you to put aside your “ego” as such and enable you to hear what your subconscious is trying to tell you. It also allows you to embed the images into your subconscious in a clearer way.

3. Belief – Making sure that you truly believe is also important as negative thoughts will make the process take longer. Understanding that things will not happen the very next day or even maybe at first is an important part, so that you do not get disheartened.

4. Use Affirmations- Using affirmations to work alongside your vision board will super charge it with extra power allowing you to bring your hopes and dreams into fruition more quickly and on a larger scale.

5. Surround Yourself – Surrounding yourself with reminders of your vision board and your goals is very important, as it allows you to keep your mind “topped up” with the sight, sounds and even in some cases, smells, of what you want to accomplish and bring to your life.

6. Add mood colors – Adding colors that represent your goals can help in a fast acting way. It is said that certain colors help us to feel a certain way. For example; blue is known to be a calming color, yellow, friendly and happy, and red is associated with excitement.

7. Make one at a time – Having too many vision boards can distract your mind from the goal you are trying to achieve. This can effectively splits your visions and the power to make them happen splits, too. By sticking to one specific board, you make sure that the full power is on it and not just a slice.

8. Meditate- Meditation is another fantastic way to help you while using a vision board. Imagining that you have this specific life, career etc., and seeing yourself do things, helps to push your mind into the image, sending out very strong signals.

9. Make things specific – Too many different ideas on your board can create a conflict, and you will find that you become stumped as you only find part of each one materializing. Keep your theme constant, this makes it powerful.

10. Forgive yourself – By forgiving yourself of any past problems that carry any guilt or pain you are able to eradicate the negative from your subconscious mind for good! This is a pivotal point because without it you will only be held back. So give yourself a break, relax and let the negative past wash away from your mind for good.

For free vision board training, visit Vision Board How To

Developing patience can have significant long-term benefits for you, your family, your friends and your health. It seems the most common and quite possibly the easiest way to lose patience is around people, especially our children. It is possible to develop extraordinary amounts of patience with little effort. Really, the bottom line of patience is an awareness of yourself, your situation and your thoughts. Once you’ve mastered this, having patience is easy. But how to you develop awareness?

Awareness comes from the realization that there is something at work which is larger than ourselves. Each of us is not the center of our own universe, but rather a small part of something very large that works in harmony with what we present to it. In other words, you get back what you give. If you are impatient, you’ll attract a million reasons to be impatient. You’ll be surrounded by disgruntled people, situations that do not flow properly and bad energy. Change your reaction and you’ll experience magic.

Here are 5 tips to develop more patience in any situation.

1. Become Aware of Your Impatience

Throughout any given day, each of us experiences many different emotions and feelings. The first thing you must do to begin developing patience is to recognize impatience. If you are feeling stressed or frenzied, figure out what feelings and emotions are present. Do you feel anxious, guilty, angry, resentful or impatient? Once you pinpoint the feeling, then look to see what is causing it. Decide if the feeling is necessary and how much your could improve this moment for yourself and those around you if you choose a better feeling.

One example that I can think of is with children. My child takes forever getting himself into our vehicle. I could become impatient, yell, physically put him into the car, berate him for lollygagging and create and entirely unnecessary situation. Sometimes I do become impatient when this happens, but I think about why I am in such a hurry that would require me to squash my son’s playful moment of lollygagging. As adults, and for the benefit of quality of life, some of us should do much more lollygagging than we do. Therefore, when I become aware of my feelings, I either stand there quietly and wait, knowing that he will get himself situated at some point, or I lollygag with him, fully enjoying this fleeting moment of joy.

2. Bring Yourself Back to the Moment

The moment you are living, right now, is the only moment you can control. What happened yesterday cannot be changed, and what’s happening tomorrow hasn’t yet arrived. When you feel yourself losing patience, try to figure out what’s causing it. Are you in a hurry? Why? What do you expect from rushing something or someone? Do you believe 5 extra minutes of time that could be gained by rushing is really going to make or break you? Bring yourself back to right now and be here, in the moment. No matter if you are at work, at home, with your children or with your friends, this moment is precious. Live in it.

3. Breathe and Count

The whole business of counting to 10 when you are stressed or impatient works wonders, but only if you actually do it. Counting to 10 actually can help you come back to the moment. It stops the racing thoughts and gives you a quick time out, a breather, a mini-meditation session. Counting to 10 will allow you to stop and regroup your thoughts and actions, hopefully giving you the benefit of choosing an emotion that feels better and improves the situation.

4. Assess Your Situation and Create a Distraction

One great way to develop more patience is to avoid situations that may cause you to become impatient. Whenever you blow your cool, assess the situation that you are currently in and figure out if you can safely remove yourself from it, or if that option is worth it. If you’re sitting in rush hour traffic, attempting to make it to work on time, your impatience will not make traffic move any faster. In fact, if you’re in an angry and bitter mood, your time will seem even longer. You don’t have much choice, unless taking the day off is an option for you. So, create a distraction. Turn on the radio, watch the clouds or put in a CD on developing more patience! If you can avoid the situation, walk away.

5. Blow Off Steam

If you are looking for ways to develop more patience, chances are you are looking for ways to improve your overall quality of life. Everyone has tough days. If you’re experiencing a day where you just can’t bring yourself back to the moment and be cool, go and blow off some steam. Do some exercise, dance, take a bubble bath or go roller skating. Figure out if you need to find an activity in which aggression is acceptable, like boxing or football, or if a relaxation technique would be more suitable. Either way, you must take a break from whatever is causing your impatience. When you must return to the situation, you’ll find you are better able to be patient with whatever is going on.

For updates on articles designed to help you find joy, peace, happiness and freedom in your life, please sign up for my email updates. You’ll get access to cool free stuff as it becomes available, starting with a free law of attraction ebook download.

I encourage you to leave comments about your experiences with developing patience and further advice that you may have for others. Looking forward to hearing your thoughts.

You keep hearing that meditation is extremely important to well-being, stress relief and reaching your highest goals and dreams, right? Years ago, the concept of meditation was considered by many to be some kooky, new-age nonsense that was practiced by people very different from ourselves. No longer is this the case. The HUGE benefits of meditation are being discovered, discussed, practiced and realized by many, many people, including people just like you.

But it can sometimes be difficult to get the hang of meditation.

When you first decide to hop onto this meditation bandwagon and see what the fuss is all about, you’re probably going to wonder if you’ll ever understand exactly what meditation ‘feels’ like. As you sit and attempt to become ‘quiet’ your thoughts get louder than they’ve ever been before and you begin to realize just how powerful your mind might be. And how on earth will you ever get control of it?

Here are 5 tips to improve your experience with meditation and get better and more effective results. Discover the power that meditation can bring into your life.

1. Practice, practice, practice…

Everyone says it. This analogy has been used a million times. It’s like riding a bike. In order to master the art of meditation and discover the extremely powerful benefits that this practice can bring to your life, mind, body and spirit, you absolutely have to practice. Not many of us got on a bike and just rode off into the sunset. Meditation is the same way. The first couple of time, 5 times, 20 times that you sit and attempt to quiet your mind, you’ll probably want to give up. But just know that if you keep at it, there will be a lightbulb at some point. Make the commitment.

2. Make the Commitment

Speaking of commitment, you’ll want to try and harness all the self-control you can muster and make meditation a daily part of your life. This is much easier said than done, because we can think of a hundred things to do that we already think are working for us, like cleaning, running after the kids, working, eating, sleeping and watching the tube. If you’ve only read about the benefits that meditation can have, but have never experienced it yourself, you may be more apt to shrug it off. If you make the commitment to work 20 minutes to a half hour of practice into your daily schedule, only then will you reap the rewards.

3. Remove Distractions

In order to effectively meditate, especially for a beginner, you’ll want to create an environment that’s distraction free. Shut off the radio, television and cell phone, wait for the kids to take a nap and find a spot that is quiet, peaceful and serene. If you don’t know of a spot like that, find one or create one. Go sit outside, lie on a park bench, sit in the bathroom or hide under your bed. The best thing to do is to create a ’space’ in your favorite room. Light candles, incense, play soft, rhythmic music or open a window to feel a cool breeze. Get around things that make you feel at ease and make that your place to attempt meditation.

4. Count Your Breaths

When you are first beginning meditation, counting your breaths is said to be the best way to get into your ‘zone.’ I usually start at 10 and work my way backwards. Try to take deep breaths that you can feel in your abdomen. Count these and try to focus only on the number and your breathing. Whenever I begin to meditate, I still find other thoughts getting in and taking me away from my counting. When this happens, I start back and 10 and try to refocus. After a while, you’ll find that you are able to connect to a deeper place within your mind as you count. That’s the beginning of the fun!

5. Look for Images, Listen for Sounds and Enjoy the Peace

Meditation results in many different experiences for many different people. No one outcome is something that should be expected. You’ll find that your own experience with meditation may be quite unique. As you learn to quiet your mind and look beyond your surface thoughts, you may notice images, sounds and memories come to the surface. Meditating is a bit like dreaming. If you can stay with these waking dreams, you may find answers to current problems, healing opportunities and pleasant memories of old friends appearing for your enjoyment. No matter how your personal meditation experience plays out, you should feel less stress, the discovery of inspiration and a calm and present peace of mind when you are finally able to get into the zone.

For updates on articles designed to help you find joy, peace and freedom from worry, please sign up for my email updates. You’ll get access to cool free stuff as it becomes available, starting with a free law of attraction ebook download.

I encourage you to leave comments about your experiences with meditation and further advice that you may have for others. Please contribute below.

With all the recent interest in vampires, I thought I would talk a bit about vampires that are a little less sexy, a little less interesting and a little less fun to watch. These are emotional vampires. We’ve all got them in our lives, and it’s important to our own health and well-being to become aware of their presence.

What is an Emotional Vampire?

An emotional vampire is a person who brings you down. Someone who affects your mood, your level of energy and sometimes your whole day (week, month?) If you think about it right now, I’ll bet you can identify someone whom you may try to avoid or don’t like talking to because when it’s over you feel worse than before it began. These people may complain all the time, use guilt to get what they want or become downright devious. They may create drama where there was none, start rumors, cry, whine, insult, argue or complain excessively. Let’s hope you don’t identify this person as yourself, but if you do, that’s actually good. We can get to work on changing that behavior forever once you’re aware of it. As for other people, well, here are 5 tips for recognizing and releasing emotional vampires from your life.

1. Check Your Mood

If your mood is consistently worsened by the presence of one or more people, you might check to see if the emotional vampire phenomenon is to blame. You may sometimes hear that darkness is destroyed by the presence of light, but I can tell you from experience that some people can’t be lit. If you’ve tried to use your wit, charm, positive talk and smiles to lighten up someone else, and it just ain’t workin’, you might have an emotional vampire on your hands. Try to avoid them if possible. If it’s not possible, it’s likely you’ll end up needing counseling.

2. Check Your Progress

Do you have somewhere you need to go or be? Do you have something you need to get done? Are you running late or completely distracted because someone is doing, saying or acting a certain way that is interfering with your life? It’s important to understand that this isn’t about blaming others for your actions, but emotional vampires have a way of keeping you from your best moments. They don’t particularly like anything shiny. If you’re trying to shine and you’re feeling particularly dull, check back with step one and see what your mood is like. Step away from the emotional vampires and get on with your day.

3. Are You Involved in a Crisis that You Didn’t Create?

Emotional vampires have a way of involving you in their misdeeds, possibly without your even being aware of it. Think of any drama that you’re currently involved in and check to see if it’s yours. Have you been guilted into helping someone with a situation that didn’t have anything to do with you? Are you being blamed for something that you didn’t do? Are you trying to fix someone else’s problems while they sit around and just complain? Stop it. Stop it right now.

4. Do you Feel Depressed?

Do you avoid going home, or going to work, or going to visit your family? Do you get depressed when you are faced with a particular situation or event because you dread having to deal with a particular person who makes you feel miserable? Though our feelings are our own, and we really do get to choose which ones we latch on to, emotional vampires make this choice much more difficult than it needs to be. If you are genuinely happy for most of your day, but find yourself feeling depressed at the thought of coming into contact with someone specific, that person may be an emotional vampire.

5. Check Your Truth

Truth is relative…even your truth. If you are constantly fighting and arguing with someone over big things, small things, petty things or even no things, you might want to take a moment and check your truth. Just because you believe something, doesn’t necessarily make it true for everyone else. Fighting and bickering is not likely to change someone else’s truth. Emotional vampires come in all shapes and sizes and are sometimes difficult to detect. Your actions, no matter how noble, may just be interfering with someone else’s day, making you a potential emotional vampire for them. This life is just too short to be miserable. If you are genuinely trying to become less miserable, you need to stay true to yourself and only yourself. There are plenty of people in the world that will resonate with your truth, no matter what it is. Seek out those people, often referred to as like-minded, and you’ll find yourself feeling happier, getting more accomplished and truly looking forward to being in the company of people who don’t suck the life right out of you.

For updates on articles designed to help you find joy, peace and freedom from worry, please sign up for my email updates. You’ll get access to cool free stuff as it becomes available, starting with a free law of attraction ebook download.

I encourage you to leave comments about your experiences with emotional vampires. Please feel free to add anything that I may have left out. Let’s pour sunlight on these emotional vampires and put an end to this type of behavior for good!

This is a great article by Roberta Mittman. The three Rs explained below align with my experience on how to relieve stress, gain peace and start to get a perspective on your life. Take this brilliant advice given by Roberta and please keep me updated on the changes you see in your own life.

Avoid a Personal Energy Crisis: A 3Rs Example
By: Roberta Mittman

You’ve read a lot about maintaining energy. You understand all the common Energy Zappers and Energy Fixes in theory. But in practice…maybe it’s not so easy to see how the 3Rs fit in for you. How about an example to demonstrate?

Meet Janet. Janet is a middle manager at a corporation that has struggled lately. Janet’s department was downsized last month. She and her staff have been working furiously to pick up the slack. Janet is exhausted by her own duties as well as seeing how the strain is affecting everyone else.

Janet believes in her company and wants to see it succeed, but she’s also aware that her health is suffering. Something has to give. Janet applies the 3Rs and comes up with these results:

RECOGNIZE what’s going on. The daily uphill battle to get it all done leaves Janet feeling helpless and ineffective. To top it off, her friendly but out-of-touch boss tosses his non-priority tasks to his managers. Janet has never objected to his demands, so she’s usually the one he calls on first.

Janet realizes she has two classic Energy Zappers working against her: unrealistic expectations and poor boundaries.

REFRAME your thoughts and actions. Janet knows she alone cannot fix all the company’s problems. So instead she strives to change how she looks at them. She’s been starting each day with a defeating thought: “I can’t do it all.” She decides to banish the negative “can’t” from her mind. Her new affirmation: “I can get the most important things done today, and I can do them brilliantly.”

Reframing also means actions, not just thoughts. So Janet acts by writing down her new resolve on three notecards. She tapes one to her bathroom mirror so she’ll be encouraged before she leaves home in the morning. She puts the second card in her pants pocket, knowing she’ll get a reminder when she reaches for her subway card. Then, when she gets to the office, Janet puts the third card in her top desk drawer. Now she’ll have a surprise pep talk every time she grabs a pencil or sticky note.

Janet then makes a realistic list of today’s goals–not a long, impossible, and overwhelming list, but the most critical tasks. Throughout the day, she boldly crosses out each one as she accomplishes it. It’s a busy day, but when 6pm arrives, Janet’s list shows she has successfully completed all of her original tasks–plus an emergency that came up one unexpectedly. It’s the first time in months she’s felt a sense of accomplishment.

As Janet is leaving, her boss appears with a thick file and tells her to make sure it’s taken care of. Janet recognizes this task as something that will be relevant soon but is not crucial right now. She explains that her department is swamped with another project that is more time-sensitive. Janet shows him her list of the day’s finished tasks. He is visibly shocked at how much is going on, and he agrees that the file can wait.

RECLAIM the health you deserve. At the end of her first day of “cans,” Janet is tired but not completely drained. For the first time in weeks, she even finds the will to leave through the lobby and smile at the receptionist instead of sneaking out the back way to be alone. Self-assertion and a sense of accomplishment are a great pair of natural energy boosters!

Janet is a fictional character, but she’s much like many of my real patients who attest that the 3Rs work. Put them to work and plug the holes that are draining away your zip.
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